Forgive Forget

Hello! :(

 

 

It seems almost ironic, but yesterday, two hours after my full-of-hope-and-fight-for-the-good post, I had another binge attack. :'(

There was this pack of chips, and I thought "just a handful to savour"... of course it didn't stay with the handful.

Ripping the pack of chips open gave me a shot of adrenaline alike the one a drug addict feels when the needle pierces their vein. There is no way to stop.

 

The worst thing? I DON'T EVEN ENJOY IT.

I might enjoy the first handful, maybe even the second. But then, it is just binging - the pack of chips, the ice-cream, and the chocolate to top things off. It is not indulgence of the pleasurable kind - it is, in fact, punishing myself. "You started it, now to end it." Like the mother who catches you snatching a praline and forces you to eat the whole box. Remember?

 

So yeah, I felt pretty awful afterwards.

 

 

Today, I had only fruit til the afternoon - an apple, a tangerine, and a sugarfree energy drink for breakfast, another tangerine for snack. Veggie wok and a little bread for midday, along with another sugarfree energy drink. And mashed potatoes and beans for supper. No exercise :(

 

Tomorrow to get moving, and lose that weight (109,2 kg - 240.11 lb). Want to be under 240 lb again!!!

 

 

 

When I see what some people can do who are much more handicapped than me!

 (Nelly Furtado - "Spirit Indestructible")
starring Spencer West climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro
with only his hands.

 

 

 

When I see this, I know that with endurance and strong will I CAN DO IT.

I can lose this weight. I can become who I wish to be.

 

 (The Script - "Hall of Fame")

 

And you can, too.